“Pfffft!”
Chloe sighed dramatically. She glanced sideways to gauge its effect. There wasn’t any. Apparently, her "I’m-inconspicuously-trying-to-get-your-attention" move was ineffective. Darren was still glued to the television.
‘Idiot,’ she muttered to herself. She sighed again and made a production of getting comfortable on the sofa. Darren absent-mindedly reached over and tapped her knee without looking her way.
“Oh, you’re getting up? Good. Could you get me another Fanta? I really want to see what happens next.”
Chloe glanced at the television incredulously. She failed to see the allure of MANswers and didn’t really care whether or not your farts could save your buddy from drowning.
“You know, somewhere in the Corporate World, there’s a guy who invented commercials so you can get off your ass and get things yourself,” she informed him.
Darren looked at her blankly. “What? Corporate World? That wasn’t on the park map. Did I miss that section last weekend?”
“Oh yeah, you bypassed that when you spent all your time in Fantasy Land,” Chloe replied sarcastically.
“Bummer,” replied Darren as he turned back to his show.
Chloe sighed dramatically. She glanced sideways to gauge its effect. There wasn’t any. Apparently, her "I’m-inconspicuously-trying-to-get-your-attention" move was ineffective. Darren was still glued to the television.
‘Idiot,’ she muttered to herself. She sighed again and made a production of getting comfortable on the sofa. Darren absent-mindedly reached over and tapped her knee without looking her way.
“Oh, you’re getting up? Good. Could you get me another Fanta? I really want to see what happens next.”
Chloe glanced at the television incredulously. She failed to see the allure of MANswers and didn’t really care whether or not your farts could save your buddy from drowning.
“You know, somewhere in the Corporate World, there’s a guy who invented commercials so you can get off your ass and get things yourself,” she informed him.
Darren looked at her blankly. “What? Corporate World? That wasn’t on the park map. Did I miss that section last weekend?”
“Oh yeah, you bypassed that when you spent all your time in Fantasy Land,” Chloe replied sarcastically.
“Bummer,” replied Darren as he turned back to his show.
Chloe sighed dramatically
again, but this time with bite. Nothing was
more annoying than when sarcasm misses its mark. Abruptly she got up off the sofa. She stood in front of the television and
stared at Darren, hands on her hips. He
craned his neck around to try to look past her.
“Honneeee,” he moaned, “I can’t seeeee!”
“Look, it’s time I laid it all on the line,” Chloe said, ignoring Darren’s plea and not budging. “If you don’t change, this is over.”
Darren glanced down at his t-shirt, then over to the clock. “I’m o-kaaay,” he replied slowly. “And it’s not over for another thirteen minutes.”
Chloe hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. “Honestly, if you were any slower, you’d be going backward. Us, Darren! We’re over!”
“Wait – what? Like, over over?” Chloe was pleasantly surprised to see that she now had his full attention. But then she realized it was only because Darren’s show had switched to a commercial. Irritated, she gave him The Look.
Darren knew that he wasn't the smartest guy Chloe had dated, but he understood that look - this time. The first time he saw it he ignored it, and it was a disaster. This time, he quickly tried to backpedal.
“But, babe, I’m watching this for you!”
Chloe shook her head slightly, as if shaking out cobwebs. “What?!” she asked.
“I’m trying to be well-rounded. You’ve always said you wished I knew more stuff.”
“Stuff? Stuff?! I meant educational, useful stuff! Things you can apply to your everyday life.”
“Well, this stuff applies. It could, I mean…” Darren shifted uncomfortably, “…it’s survival stuff, so it’s useful, and its stuff I didn’t know, so it’s educational, and ….” Darren jutted his chin out defensively and pointed toward the television. “This stuff’s important!”
Chloe slowly shook her head, almost amused. “I’m sorry. If you were right, I’d agree with you.” With an air of finality, she spun on her heel and stormed out of the living room.
Darren looked after her hopefully. “Hey, are you getting me a Fanta?”
“Honneeee,” he moaned, “I can’t seeeee!”
“Look, it’s time I laid it all on the line,” Chloe said, ignoring Darren’s plea and not budging. “If you don’t change, this is over.”
Darren glanced down at his t-shirt, then over to the clock. “I’m o-kaaay,” he replied slowly. “And it’s not over for another thirteen minutes.”
Chloe hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. “Honestly, if you were any slower, you’d be going backward. Us, Darren! We’re over!”
“Wait – what? Like, over over?” Chloe was pleasantly surprised to see that she now had his full attention. But then she realized it was only because Darren’s show had switched to a commercial. Irritated, she gave him The Look.
Darren knew that he wasn't the smartest guy Chloe had dated, but he understood that look - this time. The first time he saw it he ignored it, and it was a disaster. This time, he quickly tried to backpedal.
“But, babe, I’m watching this for you!”
Chloe shook her head slightly, as if shaking out cobwebs. “What?!” she asked.
“I’m trying to be well-rounded. You’ve always said you wished I knew more stuff.”
“Stuff? Stuff?! I meant educational, useful stuff! Things you can apply to your everyday life.”
“Well, this stuff applies. It could, I mean…” Darren shifted uncomfortably, “…it’s survival stuff, so it’s useful, and its stuff I didn’t know, so it’s educational, and ….” Darren jutted his chin out defensively and pointed toward the television. “This stuff’s important!”
Chloe slowly shook her head, almost amused. “I’m sorry. If you were right, I’d agree with you.” With an air of finality, she spun on her heel and stormed out of the living room.
Darren looked after her hopefully. “Hey, are you getting me a Fanta?”
© Dahlia Ramone: October 8, 2017
***
***
This was written for Blogophilia.
Week 33.10 Topic: It was a Disaster
Bonus Prompts:
Hard (2 pts): Quote from a J K Rowling book *
Easy (1 pt): Mention a car part (gauge - second sentence)
*"Honestly, if you were any slower, you'd be going backward"
(from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets) (14th paragraph)
Side note:
I’m recycling and updating
something I wrote for Blogophilia in February, 2010. The topic and bonus prompts at that time
were:
Blogophilia 51.2 Topic: "It's Time I Laid It All on the Line"
* "I'm sorry. If you were right, I'd agree with you."
Blogophilia 51.2 Topic: "It's Time I Laid It All on the Line"
Bonus points:
(hard, 2pts) - incorporate a Robin Williams quote in your blog *
(easy, 1pt) - mention 'pay now, worry later' (I did not)
(hard, 2pts) - incorporate a Robin Williams quote in your blog *
(easy, 1pt) - mention 'pay now, worry later' (I did not)
* "I'm sorry. If you were right, I'd agree with you."
